I need a break, it's true. I've been planning a vacation to Guatemala for several years. It's finally time to head out. I need some time to "get away." Brunswick is getting on my nerves. It is small suburbia, with all the middle-class woes suburbia comes with. I guess that's a pretentious dislike. Less pretentious is the fact that I'm going crazy, I end the day by snuggling with Robert and crying. That's not good.
I haven't left for Guatemala yet because Robert is determined to stay in one place and grow deep roots in community. That's a good thing, but someone with my travel-lust, I just need to get out of the US every now and then or at least hop my way to the nearest adventure. Robert and I talked a long time last night and we decided it would be good for me to go alone, to get out of the house and do what I want. I'm only going for a month, and I'll hole up in Xela, with a few side-trips to Tikal. I want to do some heavy writing and learning of Spanish. I also want to work at an orphanage in Xela--do some true good with this blood-money I have. I want to learn. Immerse myself not solely in the knowlege of books, but also in the wisdom of living.
I need, for my own well-being, to back away from my pain about the church, and come back to it, ready to work towards love with new tools and rejuvenation. I don't think Guatemala will give me all these things, but I think it'll help. I've also started back up in counseling and medication.
I leave mid-May and I'm going to try to be several weeks ahead in school (I've ended up taking/working on 29 credits this term, which was stupid) before I buy the tickets. I'll come back around the end of June.
Also, I'm enabling comments. I had them disabled before because my blogs had been subpoenaed during discovery and anyone who commented in the blog was subject to being subpoenaed as well. Now it's no longer a problem.
1 comment:
Hi Michelle,
Thank you for the kind words, I appreciate that you took the time to share your feelings about the time you stayed here. I'm sorry that you were going through a difficult time while you were here, and still may be struggling (just an assumption from reading a little of your blog). I have been on my own path of healing for many, many years and know well the ups and downs, twists and turns this unplanned detour through life can take. I don't know you well, but our paths in this life crossed and you have a place in my heart. I pray that you have continued strength as you move forward on your path to healing/restoration. And that you feel held in both the good times and the not so good times.
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